My observation:
Have realistic expectations and do what you can to set the truck’s computer up for success. Sync software only has so much processing power to play with, and that processing power is probably 2-3 years old by the time the truck is new. I’m sure they periodically upgrade, but we’re not talking about massive upgrades here.
if you’re shutting down with the bluetooth connected phone, start up is going to have to search for and find that phone successfully. The software for sure has a timeout and as you have observed a ‘default’ player. What if the truck doesn’t discover the b/t device(s) ?
I try to shut down on FM at home, when I’m not going to drive again for an extended period - a day or more, because over the 4 years of ownership I’ve encountered some weird things.
shut down on XM and you can start up and immediately go into an XM update, from which you cannot change source or channels. Shut down in xm with no signal, like in a parking garage, and sometimes you can’t change source or channel either and, as a bonus, once you acquired the signal, channel can only be changed to itself no matter what until you cycle the ignition.
CarPlay? yeah... too much hassle honestly. Nice to have as a backup but there are a few idiosyncrasies that make using it less enjoyable.
Slow to respond? Who here remembers sync 2.1 ? My Rap came with that version, and it would drop bluetooth routinely.
Grass is greener? Yeah... I don’t think so. I just shopped a few vehicles before picking up the wife’s Lincoln, and they’re different for sure, some do things right and have deficiencies, others do most things average. I’ll say that Sync does some things better than competitors and has a few deficiencies that could be addressed, but they’re not major.
I find that if you let the truck start, wait for enough time for the truck to attain GPS satellite signal ; and be ready for navigation, you can engage remote audio source more quickly. Usually you’re ready to navigate in about 30 seconds. If this bugs you, I can easily remember Garmin units that routinely took 2 minutes to acquire satellites and be ready to roll.